Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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