Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize