I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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