Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize