How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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