Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
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