i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
