why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
