We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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