youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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