sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
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