We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
