I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
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i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
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