I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
When are your genitals available?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
