No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
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