What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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