I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
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