I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
