This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
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