You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Randomize
