i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Randomize
