Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
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using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
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Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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