I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
