did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
i need some magic done to my vagina
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
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