It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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