Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
