real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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