Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
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