i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
