come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
