girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
