I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
