me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
