thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
3 2 1 whiskey
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
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