so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
