morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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