I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
