I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
there was a trapeze. enough said
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Randomize
