chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Randomize