whjeg hajt iyt
wanna hang out?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP