I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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