I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
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We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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