Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
