did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Randomize
