well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize