I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
