I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
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