Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?