i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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