That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
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