I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
