I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
