Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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