everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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