hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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